Readers who are ‘down with the Sewer’ will have seen and dismissed this junker of a movie years ago, but for those of you still uninitiated, here it is; the holy grail of psychotronic films, the né plus ultra of sleaze, the nadir of filmic negativity: (where was I?) oh yes, Cannibal Ferox (aka Make Them Die Slowly).
This forbidden treat, ‘banned in 31 countries!’ will forever have more value as something you wonder about, rather than something you’ve actually seen, and there are those of you who will take the plunge despite what you are about to read.
So, if the idea of a horrible Italian cannibal movie with poor dubbing, no plot, crude special effects, and live animal slaughter sounds enticing to you, read on. And don’t worry, they sounded good enough to me that I watched the thing twice. Only for you, dear reader, only for you.
Cannibal Ferox tells the tale of an eager-beaver chippy out to gain her doctorate with a thesis on cannibalism; always a pleaser. She and her assistants run into a couple of snags on their way into the jungle; their jeep breaks down and they hook up with an insane drug dealer who puts them on the wrong side of a tribe of cannibals.
Loads of incoherent babbling accompanies seemingly endless stock footage of monkeys cavorting in the trees and other sundry wildlife. Once in while the drug dealer ‘Naughty Mike,’ (Giovanni Lombardo Radice) rapes or kills a tribe member.
Meanwhile, the hungry cannibals like variety in their diet, actually slaughtering and dismembering on camera a huge live turtle and a little crocodile. Eventually, the cannibals grow tired of Mike and his friends, cutting off and eating various appendages of the group in lurid detail.
The thesis turns out to be a big hit.
Obviously the gleeful thought of brain and intestine chomping is the draw for Cannibal Ferox, with the depraved attitude of the goings on a close second.
And you do indeed get a gutful of offal, but you also get a frightfully xenophobic point-of-view and the universally maligned animal killings that seem to be a staple of movies of this type.
The new Grindhouse Releasing DVD of Cannibal Ferox comes with an invaluable commentary track by director Umberto Lenzi and ‘Naughty Mike’ Radice, which will force you to watch this thing twice, but also significantly deepen your understanding of the movie.
It is certainly amusing hearing Radice call the movie shit while pitying those who watch it, even as Lenzi thinks he’s done a great job with a serious picture. Also, depending on whom you believe, the hapless animal victims may have been purchased as food items at a market in the nearby Colombian town of Leticia and promptly eaten by the starving local extras and crew-members, or not.
Though I don’t defend killing anything on film for fun or profit, I think this explanation is believable and that the animals were summarily eaten. Kind of makes ya think, though, doesn’t it?
That said, the commentary track really is the best part of this DVD, and I have to recommend it for that reason. Sadly, watching it while listening to said track reveals the true ineptitude of this largely boring movie.
Then again, there is the appeal of checking out a couple of be-wigged, mud-covered ‘natives’ tearing into someone’s stomach cavity and slurping up intestines…
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